You might know my friend, Will Power.
In fact, I hear about him a lot around this time of year. Will Power loves to show up around holiday times and close to the New Year.
He’s movie star handsome and ever so charismatic. Will Power is the kind of guy who you really want to believe in.
He carries the hope that we can be in total control. He promises us that if we just apply enough umph, enough muscle, we can reach our goals. If we follow Will Power, we can have the “perfect” body (whatever that is), we can be happy all the time, we can have whatever we want, if we just hang out with Will Power.
But here’s the catch about our debonair friend Will.
He’s got some intense friends and he doesn’t stick around for the long haul.
Here’s how our relationship with Will Power usually unfolds:
- First DESIRE & LONGING make the introductions:
Desire & Longing say: “I want to be healthy! I want to unhook from my sugar and carb cravings and maybe even release a few pounds. I’m not going to gain weight this holiday season. I’m going to have Will Power!”
- The mighty WILL POWER steps in
“I’m going to be strong and use my strength to resist foods that don’t nourish my body!”
- HOPEFUL, CONFIDENT & IN CONTROL show up and make it a party!
“It’s working! I can do this! I’m successful! I feel great!”
- But then DEPRIVATION & CRAVING crash the party
“Argh, I feel deprived I’m getting cranky, I can’t help it, there are sweets everywhere. My cravings are raging.”
- and it’s all OUT OF CONTROL
“Oh, I feel so bad about what I just did!”
- SELF-BLAME & GUILT take over
“Will Power ditched me, I feel so bad”
- HOPELESSNESS becomes our new hang out buddy.
OUCH!
I used to live in that relationship with Will Power. It’s really painful and so disappointing. It really doesn’t work.
Will Power is a strong-arming technique, and as women we need a much gentler, and more supportive way to create change.
We need to get to know the elegant and ever so inviting Self-Compassion instead. Self-compassion, even though not quite as jazzy as Will, is a better friend, in the long run.
The reality is – and research backs this up – that self-compassion is much more successful at supporting change than willpower.
So if your longing and desire are speaking up and wanting you to feel good in your body, I invite you to step into Self-Compassion.
I also invite you to step into my 28 Day Smokin’ Hot Mom Challenge.
It’s a kinder, more soulful, and effective way to step into a healthy New Year. We’re starting on January 11th.
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Nina Manolson, MA, CHC, is the Smokin’ Hot & Soulful Mom Mentor and Family Wellness Expert. She’s the founder of SmokinHotMom.com and HealthyYummyKids.com. She is a certified Health Coach and Psychology of Eating Coach.
She helps busy moms look and feel their best, and helps them feed their kids well in a world that doesn’t.
She’s the author of “Feed Your Kids Well In A World That Doesn’t: an everyday guide to make healthy food happen in your home and beyond”. She’s also the recipient of the prestigious Health Leadership Award from the Institute for Integrative Nutrition.
Nina Manolson, MA, is the founder of Body-Peace®.She helps women end the war with food and body and finally feel truly at home in their body—as it is.
She is known for her deeply feminist, anti-diet, body-peace® approach. She brings her 30 years of experience as a therapist, Body-Trust® Guide and Psychology of Eating Teacher to helping women create a respectful and trusting relationship with their food and body.
Nina’s Body-Peace® work is all in service of helping people get off the diet roller-coaster, and into a compassionate and powerful way of eating & living which creates a positive long-lasting change in and with their bodies. Her courses, coaching, poems and Body-Peace APP positively change the conversation that women are having with their body.
Start your Body-Peace® journey with this free masterclass that will help you understand and shift your relationship with your body.
