I’m back to the cold from a blissful visit with my mom in Florida. And, I’m back to the high-speed schedule of my life.
I noticed one really powerful thing that happened as soon as I got back to the deadlines, demands, and tight scheduling of my life in Boston.
I wanted to go on a diet!
A secret diet, no less!
So today I want to talk to you about what’s often going on underneath our diet voice. The one that says “Monday, I’ll start my diet,” or in my case (and maybe you can relate): “let’s do a secret diet, so no one will know that I’m dieting.”
One thing about me (you may know this already) is that I don’t believe in diets. They don’t work and I’ve tried hundreds of them. Everyday I work with women who have tried the latest willpower diet and have failed, losing trust in themselves and their body.
But as my re-encountered my life-stressors, wondering how I could fit everything into my week (and into my life!) – I looked in the mirror – and my old critical diet voice came roaring back.
OUCH!
Now my old diet voice has gotten much quieter over the years, as my wise self-nurturing voice has gotten stronger, and I’ve learned to trust and love my body.
But yesterday she – my old critical diet voice – was on a tirade!
“You should really go on a diet!
Just lose those extra pounds you gained from not moving as much because of your shoulder injury. In fact, how about you go on a secret diet before the 28 Day Smokin’ Hot Mom Challenge (which starts on Friday!) so you can have a head start and feel more confident because you’ll have lost some weight”
…and on and on she went.
Woah! That old diet voice was in full force – and what I know about her, is that she gets loud when I’m feeling something else, something deeper – that I don’t want to feel. In this case, I was feeling out of control and a bit overwhelmed by slamming right into snow, frozen pipes, kids’ obligations, and my wonderful work responsibilities.
I was having PVO – Post-Vacation-Overwhelm!
My old diet voice was coming in to help me feel more in control. But I know that trying to control my body and weight is not the path to feeling at ease in my life.
Let me say that once more…
Trying to control your body and weight is
not the answer to feeling good in your life.
Of course you want to feel confident and comfortable in your body, but that comes from having a respectful and listening relationship with your body, not a controlling and harsh relationship with food and body.
So today, I have one very important question for you – that will help you actually learn from – and listen to your inner diet-critical voice.
Ask yourself…
“If I wasn’t feeling like I needed to go on a diet,
or feeling fat (or whatever else you tell yourself) what would I be feeling?”
I want you to look deeper, go under the diet voice and under the self-critical voice.
For some of us the answer will be clear, for others the critical voice is so ingrained that it takes some practice to tune in to your deeper needs and feelings. Our culture has trained us to focus on and “fix” our body instead of looking to our deeper needs.
Our body image and unwanted eating habits are doorways into our inner world.
When we can access our inner world, our desires and our real nurturance in life, we have more access to ease and joy in life.
I encourage you to experiment with this powerful question and notice what comes up.
And, in case you’re wondering, I’ve decided to skip the secret diet and stick with what I know really works: nurturance – delicious food – and group support. I’m doing my 28 Day Smokin’ Hot Mom Challenge!
If you’d like to dive into real nurturance and real food – no secret or fad dieting – I invite you to step into an amazing community of women as we walk into 28 delicious days with the 28 Day Smokin’ Hot Mom Challenge.
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Nina Manolson, MA, CHC, is the Smokin’ Hot & Soulful Mom Mentor and Family Wellness Expert. She’s the founder of NinaManolson.com and HealthyYummyKids.com. She is a certified Health Coach and Psychology of Eating Coach.
She helps busy moms look and feel their best, and helps them feed their kids well in a world that doesn’t.
She’s the author of “Feed Your Kids Well In A World That Doesn’t: an everyday guide to make healthy food happen in your home and beyond”. She’s also the recipient of the prestigious Health Leadership Award from the Institute for Integrative Nutrition.
To get your F.R.E.E. Video Series “What to do now, when everything you’ve done hasn’t worked” by mail and receive her healthy recipes and wellness tips click here.
Nina Manolson, MA, is the founder of Body-Peace®.She helps women end the war with food and body and finally feel truly at home in their body—as it is.
She is known for her deeply feminist, anti-diet, body-peace® approach. She brings her 30 years of experience as a therapist, Body-Trust® Guide and Psychology of Eating Teacher to helping women create a respectful and trusting relationship with their food and body.
Nina’s Body-Peace® work is all in service of helping people get off the diet roller-coaster, and into a compassionate and powerful way of eating & living which creates a positive long-lasting change in and with their bodies. Her courses, coaching, poems and Body-Peace APP positively change the conversation that women are having with their body.
Start your Body-Peace® journey with this free masterclass that will help you understand and shift your relationship with your body.
