Want to go on a diet? Do this instead

I want to go on a diet….

My daughter’s bat mitzvah is in 3 weeks (a Bat or Bar Mitzvah is a Jewish rite of passage for 13 year olds). We’ll be having family and friends come into town from many different states, Canada and England!

I’m really looking forward to it, but I noticed an old mental tape come up. “I should go on a diet!” If everyone is coming to visit, I should be thinner, I better start restricting my food.

Now just to be clear where I’m coming from, I don’t believe in diets – I haven’t been on a diet for years – and I don’t ever intend on going on another restrictive diet ever again.

I lived in the land of a new-diet-every-Monday for many years. I know that restrictive dieting doesn’t work. It boomerangs into overeating and poor food choices.

But even though I know all that, there it was, that voice that was saying: “I’m not good enough exactly how I am – I better transform myself, turn myself into a thinner, better, updated version of myself – FAST!

I know I’m not alone, because I work with many women who often say “I have a wedding, reunion, anniversary coming up and I really want to lose X pounds for the party!”

I really understand that desire. We want to put our best foot forward, we want to feel good in our clothes, we want to feel great in our own skin!

So, what’s a gal to do when she wants to look and feel her best?

Here are the three things to do instead of dieting.

SPOILER ALERT: These strategies are WAY more powerful than any diet!

1. LOVE YOURSELF EXACTLY WHERE YOU ARE!

Yup, take every ounce of energy that’s going to thinking about your diet and turn it into self-compassion and loving kindness. You BEING KIND to yourself, LOVING yourself, ACCEPTING yourself will have SO much more impact on how you feel and look than you hating yourself.

2. DIG DEEP

Whenever we have body and food issues arise, whether it’s old diet and deprivation messages – “I should diet, I feel guilty about eating what I just ate,” etc., or unwanted eating habits (binging, eating all the time, chronically eating beyond hunger, etc) – it’s a sign that there’s something else going on. It’s time to look under the surface and examine what your food and body issues are telling you. Do you want to feel more in control of your life? Do you want to be loved? What’s the real longing and desire for?

In my case, with the upcoming Bat Mitzvah (wanting to be thinner and be an upgraded version of myself), I know that underneath that is a desire for approval.

The outdated thinking that happens in my head is: “If I’m really slim (I tend to be more curvy) then everyone will be impressed, they’ll think highly of me, and I’ll get that illusory universal stamp of approval!

The state of my body becomes the measure for how “good” I am. I’ve worked very hard to give myself the stamp of approval and know that I’m good enough – no matter what my body looks like. I and we are SO much more than what our body looks like. How we feel, how we treat ourselves, how we treat the people in our lives, how well we can engage fully in life are much more powerful measures of our lives than the size of our body.

Digging deep and exploring what you really need and long for underneath the desire to go on a diet, is a truly powerful path to having a positive and healthy relationship with your food and body.

3. FEED YOURSELF EXQUISITELY!

Often when women want to “go on a diet” or “get in shape” or “feel in control of food” we stop feeding ourselves well. We go into survival eating versus exquisite and deeply nourishing eating.

I often notice women…

• Skipping meals
• Eating on the run
• Measuring calories of foods that have no real nutrient value
• Nibbling throughout the day
• Surviving on granola bars and coffee (but then grabbing whatever is around out of hunger)

If you want to really feel good in your body you MUST feed yourself EXQUISITELY.

That means, EATING! Eating 3 times a day – real food – and sitting down. It means high quality food.

If you’d like to know more about how to make an easy shift to eating high quality foods please be sure to watch Video #1 of my video series “What to do when everything you’ve done hasn’t worked.”

Living in a body you love starts with treating it right, and that means feeding it right! Don’t skimp, don’t deprive! Give yourself the gift of deep nourishment. Give yourself the gift of learning what foods really nourish you and make you glow.

So, as I move through the next few weeks of busy Bat Mitzvah prep I will be focusing on sitting down while I eat, eating the highest quality foods, loving myself exactly as I am – and using this opportunity as a time to dig deep – so that I can continually learn and grow and connect with the friends and family that are visiting from a deeply authentic place – because isn’t that what life’s all about?

 

 ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Nina Manolson, MA, CHC, certified Health Coach and Psychology of Eating Coach believes that every women deserves to feel good in their own body. She helps women create a healthy and positive relationship with their food and body so they can love their body and life!  She’s the founder of NinaManolson.com and NourishedWomanNation.com 

She helps busy women look and feel their best, and helps them feed their kids well in a world that doesn’t.

She’s the author of “Feed Your Kids Well In A World That Doesn’t: an everyday guide to make healthy food happen in your home and beyond”. She’s also the recipient of the prestigious Health Leadership Award from the Institute for Integrative Nutrition.

To get your F.R.E.E. Video Series “What to do now, when everything you’ve done hasn’t worked” by mail and receive her healthy recipes and wellness tips click here.